This article aims to talk about the patience and tolerance of parents towards their children. The father always wants to see his children better than him. The mother also carried her children in her womb for nine long months and nourished them from it. The days of sickness, the days of breastfeeding and the comfort and devotion are amongst the things parents do.
Parents are depriving themselves to provide their children with everything they need and what brings happiness to them, and they are very patient with all these meanings for the sake of their children. It is also the hard work outside the home to provide a decent living for their children and substitute a great effort to study children with children of their generation to obtain a higher degree to gain a decent living and basic needs. Parents work hard with patience and strength and do not expect in return. Fathers and mothers are like the sun from which we derive the warmth of hope, optimism and sacrifice, so our true religion recommended the importance of parents: "And We have enjoined upon man, to his parents, good treatment. His mother carried him with hardship and gave birth to him with hardship, and his gestation and weaning [period] are thirty months. [He grows] until, when he reaches maturity and reaches [the age of] forty years, he says, "My Lord, enable me to be grateful for Your favour which You have bestowed upon me and upon my parents and to work the righteousness of which You will approve and make righteous for me my offspring. Indeed, I have repented to You, and indeed, I am of the Muslims." [Quran, The Wind-Curved (Surah Al-Ahqaf), Verse 15] From here we know the value and position of parents with Allah (The Most High). He knows their patience and sacrifice, and Allah (The Most High) also revealed in the Glorious Quran: "Mothers may breastfeed their children two complete years for whoever wishes to complete the nursing [period]. Upon the father are the mothers' provision and their clothing according to what is acceptable. No person is charged with more than his capacity. No mother should be harmed through her child and no father through his child. And upon the [father's] heir is [a duty] like that [of the father]. And if they both desire to wean through mutual consent from both of them and consultation, there is no blame upon either of them. And if you wish to have your children nursed by a substitute, there is no blame upon you as long as you give payment according to what is acceptable. And fear Allah and know that Allah is Seeing of what you do." [Quran, Surah Al-Baqarah (The Cow), 233] The patience of parents is shown during blessings and afflictions of trials. Prophet Joseph (peace be upon him) with his father Prophet Jacob (peace be upon him) is a good example of sacrifice and patience. Joseph was dearest amongst Jacob's children and Allah (The Most High) wanted to test his patience by separating Jacob from Joseph for a long period. Joseph's twelve brothers were jealous of their brother and saw that he had preoccupied their father's heart for them, so they wanted to get rid of him. So they arranged a plot and trick, so they took Joseph (peace be upon him) under the pretext of hiking and playing, then they threw him in a deep well. They took his shirt and had contaminated it with false blood. His father did not believe their narration and; his eyes filled with grief for Joseph, and his absence remained for nearly forty or eighty years, and it was said otherwise, and father Jacob - peace be upon him - during all these years was patient and, so he did not lose hope for the return of his son, and he did not despair of the mercy of Allah (The Most High). Parents love their children very much and; they fear for them or when they are hurt. There are also other examples of the patience of parents with their offspring, for instance, Maryam with her son Prophet Isa (peace be upon him), Prophet Noah (peace be upon him) with his son. Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him) when he lost his son Ibrahim. Parents always see themselves in their children, and the giving is always free of charge and patience for all the difficulties that life has brought with it to build a family dominated by love, honesty, trust and morals.
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During the month of mercy, Ramadan, we wanted to create a series of article reminders on the attributes of parents. Parents are an everyday blessing where we see them, be close to them and cherish them. The feeling of gratitude pre-coronavirus and during the coronavirus pandemic where parents are our source of hope and strength. Their soothing words. The ability to push you to bounce forward from failure. The ability to believe in you when no one does. This is love.
In the Glorious Quran, Allah (The Most High) states: “And We have enjoined on man (to be good) to his parents. In travail upon travail did his mother bear him, and in two years was his weaning. Show gratitude to Me and thy parents; to Me is thy final goal” [The Quran, Surah Luqman, 31:14] The verse suggests the level of gratitude that one has towards Allah (The Most High) is just as important to parents. When we become grateful to Allah (The Most High), it is considered as an act of worship (Ibadah) which holds many rewards and gratitude to parents is also an opportunity to gain rewards. Alhamdulilah, our parents have sacrificed and tried to ensure my siblings and; I gain the basic needs but strive to give their best to make us happy. If your parents are alive, alhamdulillah serve them and take care of them as a responsibility and feelings of love. If your parents are not, this month is an opportunity for you to address them during your supplications and to think of the memories you hold between the parent-child code of behaviour and attitude. The honourable position of parents is presented in various verses of the Quran and Hadith. The whole purpose of the Abbas Foundation Trust is to remind the importance of parents. There are many qualities of parents, however, we will focus on four: love, mercy, patience and yaqeen of parents. In every religion, race, ethnicity and creed, a great emphasis and status are made about parents. We are forever indebted to our parents. Today, I will be discussing the love of parents for their children. What is love? What do we mean by the love given by our beloved parents? Love is a sentimental feeling given by people who love each other. It is stabilized by commitment, care, understanding, communication, and sacrifice. The love of parents cannot be measured nor weighed. When parents raise us with love, we become connected with people and make a positive difference by taking care of them and ourselves today and every day. We become indulged with happiness. Have you ever discovered the reason why each year more focus is being displayed on Mother’s Day and Father’s day than other relations? It is because of the unlimited love and; affection parents give to their offspring. Our mothers have undergone pain during labour, nourished us via the placenta to her womb and breastfeeding our aftermath. Before she knew what we looked like and what gender we were, she was more excited that a bundle of joy was going to exist. Sleepless nights. Belly kicks. Providing us various forms of needs from spiritual, morally, intellectually, socially, and emotionally. This is love. The ability to listen, their time, care, sacrifice and commitment are all elements of what makes loves and what makes love stronger between the family. The unlimited love that each parent provides their child and cherish them in their positive attributes and their flaws creates a happy environment for them with care and pushing their potential is a responsibility. Abdullah ibn Umar (may Allah have mercy upon him) narrated that the Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him) said: “Every one of you is a shepherd and is responsible for his flock. The leader of people is a guardian and is responsible for his subjects. A man is the guardian of his family and he is responsible for them. A woman is the guardian of her husband’s home and his children and she is responsible for them. The servant of a man is a guardian of the property of his master and he is responsible for it. No doubt, every one of you is a shepherd and is responsible for his flock.” [Hadith, Sahih Al-Bukhari 7138, Sahih Muslim 1829] The love of parents is also presented in their teachings to love Allah (The Most High), the pillars of faith (Imaan) and Islam and the principles that underlie them. Many parables of the Prophets (may Allah have mercy upon them) are sources of inspiration paving the pathway to guidance. This also inspired me to do the same with my children (if Allah wills at the time He thinks is best). Many of the Prophets (peace be upon them) and the Sahabah (Companions of the Prophets peace and blessings be upon him) presented love to their children. An example of this relationship is between Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him) and his youngest daughter Fatima (may Allah have mercy upon her) from his beloved wife Khadijah (may Allah have mercy upon her). The character of the Prophet (peace be upon him) is exemplified throughout time. Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him) narrated: “Indeed among the believers with the most complete faith is the one who is the best in conduct and the most kind to his family” [Hadith, Al-Tirmidhi] An optimised approach is required to ensure both parents and children fulfil their duties. The Prophet (peace be upon him) was not only lovable and merciful towards his children, grandchildren but anyone whom he met. Fatima (may Allah have mercy upon her) visited our beloved Prophet (peace be upon him) a lot and; she would greet him with love and; he made her sit in his position. This was the same atmosphere when he visited her house. These simple acts highlighted the profound love between them. She embodied qualities of generosity, humility, courage and selflessness who cared for the young and the old, the poor and needy and; would often give her food away even if she would go hungry herself. It was narrated by Aisha (may Allah have mercy upon her) who said: "I have not seen anyone who resembled the Prophet s.a.w in terms of words, speech and manners, more than Fatimah" Aishah continued, "When the Prophet saw her coming, he would greet her and then he would stand up for her, kissed her, took her hand and brought her to sit in his place. When the Prophet s.a.w visited her, she would greet him, stood up for him, and kissed him.” [Hadith, Al-Bukhari] The Prophet (peace be upon him) described her as one of the four best women in the entire world. Another example of the love between a parent and child was when the remains of a slaughtered animal were thrown on the back of the Prophet (peace be upon him) whilst prostrating. With courage at ten years old, Fatima removed these remains and defended her father silencing the bullies. She also witnessed the hardships faced by her siblings who left their homes due to Quraysh’s persecution. Fatima alongside her husband, Ali worked hard to provide for their children: Al-Hasan and Al-Hussain. She also nursed the wounded and other humanitarian roles in the Battles of Uhud and the Trench - this presents the strength and piety of Fatima's character. After her father passed away, she died five months later at the tender age of 29. During this period, she was burning of the deep love and departure and remained in solitude. Many of the respected scholars mentioned that she died as a martyr. Another example of the love of parents is Luqman ibn Sadun (Ibn Jarir and Al-Qutaibi) who advised his son with love. Ibn Kathir (may Allah have mercy upon him) mentioned in his book that Luqman was a wise and pious man from Aylah to – present-day Jerusalem. It was said that one day he preached to a man and someone said: “Aren’t you the slave of so and so who used to look after my sheep not so long in the past?” Luqman said: “Yes!” The man said: “What raised you to this high state I see?” Luqman said: “The Divine Decree, repaying the trust, telling the truth and discarding and keeping silent regarding what does not concern me.” In another narration, ibn Wahb said regarding his status : “Lowering my gaze, watching my tongue, eating what is lawful, keeping my chastity, undertaking my promises, fulfilling my commitments, being hospitable to guests, respecting my neighbours, and discarding what does not concern me. All these made me the one you are looking at.” One of the pieces of advice he gave to his son was to be a better Muslim by believing in Allah (The Most High) before taking care of the parents – a form of love or application of love where one must be kind. He advised that the mother is an element of mercy who makes several sacrifices in 31:14. The first few years when we exist in the world as inconsolable baby, she nursed us, countless hours of no sleep and endured so much pain, who tries to help us be the best version throughout adulthood. The genuine advice and integrity given by the parents increase our morality and faith. Another piece of advice given to his son is to pray, be patient and be strong. “O my son, establish prayer, enjoin what is right, forbid what is wrong, and be patient over what befalls you. Indeed, [all] that is of the matters [requiring] determination.” [Quran, Surah, Luqman, 31:17] Therefore, the art of love of parents to their children is expressed in different ways. Children observe, absorb and process what is taught and; parents are the building blocks of the future. Cherish your parents for their unlimited love can fill your atmosphere. Ramadan is here...
This is the time we wait with eagerness each year. A time of devotion, Performing good deeds with sincere motion. All the devils are locked away, During the 5 daily prayers, Taraweeh and Tahajjud we stand and pray. This year it starts within April until middle of May, In each day, we make our intention to fast at Suhoor. It brightens our day like noor. We spend the day performing our tasks and make dhikr, Keeping us in position with good fikr. We make dua for mercy, forgiveness and protection from the hellfire. We ask for spiritual strength, help us and fulfill our desire. In the day and night, we read the Glorious Quran. Amongst the Surahs are Al Baqarah, Al Rahman, Al-Mulk, Al-Yaseen and Al-Furqan. Each good act is considered charity even a simple smile, Build with Allah (The Most High) a good and better profile. He is the Al-Jabbar, Al-Raheem, Al-Tawwab, Al-Ghafoor, Al-Afw, Just 30 days of this beautiful month, It makes a huge impact for the old and the young. Sweetness of faith for the heart and tongue, It completes a year of fasting with the 6 days of Shawwal. With love, strength, care as colourful as floral. Parents are amongst the blessings from Allah (The Most High) due to many of their attributes and roles they perform. This article series will end with the attribute of Yaqeen.
What is Yaqeen? How is this expressed via our parents? What parables within the Glorious Quran presents this? What can we learn from the lessons? Yaqeen is the certainty and belief that Allah (The Most High) is in control of All things and is aware of the Unseen as stated in the following verse: “And with Him are the keys of the unseen; none knows them except Him. And He knows what is on the land and in the sea. Not a leaf falls but that He knows it. And no grain is there within the darknesses of the earth and no moist or dry [thing] but that it is [written] in a clear record.” [Quran, Surah Al-Anaam (The Cattle) 6:59] Yaqeen is parallel with Imaan (faith), and when there is a form of uncertainty or lack of understanding or reason of what or why something is happening it can ultimately affect the faith of the individual. Therefore, the ability to put trust in Him like unshakeable mountains is what strengthens faith and certainty. Several factors influence the amount of Yaqeen: initial thought, training and the action to maintain it through supplication (Dua). We need to purely think and believe that Allah (The Most High) wants good for us and there is always a pearl of underlying wisdom for every action that we face. When anyone is continuously tested, it is a process of purification, strengthening our relationship with Allah (The Most High) and a sign of love. “Or do you think that you will enter Paradise while Allah has not yet made evident those of you who fight in His cause and made evident those who are steadfast?” [Quran, Surah A-Imran, 3:142] “You will surely be tested in your possessions and yourselves. And you will surely hear from those who were given the Scripture before you and from those who associate others with Allah much abuse. But if you are patient and fear Allah - indeed, that is of the matters [worthy] of determination.” [Quran, Surah A-Imran, 3:186] Therefore, we need to have Husan Al-Dhan Bi Allah – a good opinion of Allah (The Most High) for the tests are blessings in disguise. It is something that grows like a seed into a full-grown plant that requires self-analysis, not having doubt and practice. So speak to Allah (The Most High) wholeheartedly and call upon Him. Abu Hurairah (may Allah have mercy upon him) reported: The Messenger of Allah, peace and blessings be upon him, said, “Call upon Allah with certainty that He will answer you. Know that Allah will not answer the supplication of a heart that is unmindful and distracted.” [Hadith, Sunan al-Tirmidhi, 3479] One of the Parables that have an emphasis on Yaqeen is the mother of Prophet Moses (peace be upon him) who had to save her son, Moses, from the mass death implemented by the Pharoah. The Pharoah dreamt that one of the Children of Bani Israel would overthrow him and he began to kill every male child. To protect her son, Allah (The Most High) gave her divine instructions as stated in the following verses from the Glorious Quran: “And We inspired to the mother of Moses, "Suckle him; but when you fear for him, cast him into the river and do not fear and do not grieve. Indeed, We will return him to you and will make him [one] of the messengers." And the family of Pharaoh picked him up [out of the river] so that he would become to them an enemy and a [cause of] grief. Indeed, Pharaoh and Haman and their soldiers were deliberate sinners. And the wife of Pharaoh said, "[He will be] a comfort of the eye for me and you. Do not kill him; perhaps he may benefit us, or we may adopt him as a son." And they perceived not. And the heart of Moses' mother became empty [of all else]. She was about to disclose [the matter concerning] he had We not bound fast her heart that she would be of the believers. And she said to his sister, "Follow him"; so she watched him from a distance while they perceived not. And We had prevented from him [all] wet nurses before, so she said, "Shall I direct you to a household that will be responsible for him for you while they are to him [for his upbringing] sincere?" So We restored him to his mother that she might be content and not grieve and that she would know that the promise of Allah is true. But most of the people do not know.” [Quran, Surah Al Qasas (The Stories), 28: 7 - 13] The first task requested by Allah (The Most High) is to breastfeed him and to place him into a basket in the river Nile. The element of Yaqeen is paramount here. How can a mother or any human being place a child or any living thing into the river? Many mothers cried about their mass death. However, the yaqeen and faith of the mother of Prophet Moses (peace be upon him) is what led her to follow the divine instructions. She knew that Allah (The Most High) is the Most Wise who counselled her that Moses will return and will become a Prophet so she should not be sad nor fear of anything. Allah (The Most High) is the best of planners and in depths of darkness within the tunnel, there is light with His Mercy. Allah (The Most High) sent Moses to the palace of the Pharoah – the mass murderer where his wife, Asiyah (may Allah have mercy upon her) fell in love and wanted to keep baby Moses. His sister, Mariam followed the basket there and; this naturally caused more worry for Moses’ mother but she maintained her Yaqeen by making dua and belief and with His grace, Moses was miraculously breastfed by none other than his mother which reassured her that he was safe. Allah (The Most High) states: “And will provide for him from where he does not expect. And whoever relies upon Allah - then He is sufficient for him. Indeed, Allah will accomplish His purpose. Allah has already set for everything a [decreed] extent.” [Quran, Surah Al-Talaq (The Divorce), 65:3] Another parable to ponder over is the story of Prophet Ibrahim with his son Prophet Ismail (peace be upon them). This time, Prophet Ibrahim had the divine dream of killing his son and naturally he was sad but he also had Yaqeen. And when he reached with him [the age of] exertion, he said, "O my son, indeed I have seen in a dream that I [must] sacrifice you, so see what you think." He said, "O my father, do as you are commanded. You will find me, if Allah wills, of the steadfast." [Quran, Surah Al-Saffat (Those who set the ranks), 37:102] This presents the yaqeen in the father and his son where both willingly accepted the will of Allah (The Most High). However, the Shaytan tried to prevent Prophet Ibrahim at three varied points. Just when Ibrahim (peace be upon him) positioned his son and was about to slaughter. Allah (The Most High) said: “O Ibrahim, You have (already) fulfilled the vision. Indeed, this is how We reward the good-doers. That was truly a revealing test. And We ransomed his son with a great sacrifice.” [Quran, Surah Al-Saffat (Those who set the ranks), 37:104-107] Ibrahim opened his eyes and was amazed that the ram was slaughtered instead of his son. This is the sacrifice of the parent and presents the mercy of Allah (The Most High). Ibrahim did not want to slaughter his son but he trusted Allah that there must be underlying wisdom or something good behind it. Moreover, another example of a parable that illustrates Yaqeen is Prophet Zakariya (peace be upon him) who prayed for many years for a child. He had Yaqeen that despite being old and his wife barren, there may be a miracle as he observed many miracles upon looking after Maryam (peace be upon her). One day during the Mihrab, the angels announced great news to the Prophet (peace be upon him) that he is to be blessed with Prophet Yahya who would believe in Allah (The Most High), a leader, Prophet of Allah and righteous. He can make the possible impossible. Yahya is derived from the meaning of life. "My Lord, grant me from Yourself a good offspring. Indeed, You are the Hearer of supplication." “So the angels called him while he was standing in prayer in the chamber, "Indeed, Allah gives you good tidings of John, confirming a word from Allah and [who will be] honourable, abstaining [from women], and a prophet from among the righteous. He said: My Lord! when shall there be a son (born) to me, and old age has already come upon me, and my wife is barren? He said: even thus does Allah what He pleases." [Quran, Surah Al-Imran, 3:38-40] To increase his yaqeen and fulfil the promise, He asked Allah (The Most High) for a sign and was requested not to speak except with gestures for three days. He increased his time in glorifying Allah (The Most High) with dhikr and supplication. He raised his son, Yahya to be for-bearing and righteous and reflected qualities in verse 3:39. This highlights how the believing parent maintained consistency and did not lose hope. He said, "My Lord, make for me a sign." He Said, "Your sign is that you will not [be able to] speak to the people for three days except by gesture. And remember your Lord much and exalt [Him with praise] in the evening and the morning." [Quran, Surah Al-Imran, 3:41] Overall, the attribute of Yaqeen of parents is unmeasurable in our everyday life and even from the parables we can see that the Prophets had parental responsibilities and during trials, they increased in worshipping Allah (The Most High) for guidance and helping their children lead a life of righteousness and try their best to support as much as possible with what they can and what they have. Cherish the blessings of parents wholeheartedly, pre-Ramadan, during Ramadan and beyond inshaAllah! “Our Lord! Forgive me and my parents, and (all) the believers on the Day when the reckoning will be established.” [Quran: Surah Ibrahim, Verse 41] There is a wise saying that states that the mercy of parents is innumerable. The righteousness of parents, kindness to them, and their obedience to Allah (The Most High) are what pleases Him. Mercy can be found in many things, so parents provide their children with everything that benefits them and keep them away from everything that harms them. Our parents love us to be better than them. They treat us with equality, listen to them and always give love, sympathy, strength and tenderness. This results in a good and cohesive family with no division from arising. Bliss does not come to bliss, so whoever wants to be righteous to his children must provide them with love, security and have mercy on them.
The Glorious Quran and Hadith necessitate mercy, compassion, love and benevolence for children until they become adults. Similarly, children have mercy upon their parents as they become older with age. The mercy of parents is taught in society to create a righteous generation. Disobedience is a disease and, education is essential to find the right path for a more bright and beautiful tomorrow with families with continuous mercy, love, safety and success. |
Hafsa and NajibLearn together the beautiful status of parents in Islam on the blessed month of Ramadan Archives
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